Los Stupid

"So you know, we're on ABC against the Spurs on March 9th. We gotta come up with something big. Shaq vs Duncan isn't enough."

"Hmm...we could go back to our orange jerseys. Alternate jerseys are a huge thing these days. That should help move some jerseys."

"Yeah, but I'm thinking bigger. We need something bigger than just alternate jerseys. Something bigger than retro jerseys."

"You is talkin loco & I like it!"

"Wait...that's it!"

"What's it?"

"Loco! We go Spanish! It'll be perfect - we'll capture the entire Hispanic demographic!"

"What are you saying - that the jerseys say 'Sol' on them?"

"Well, if we're getting techinical, it'll be 'Sols'."

"Actually, if you want to get REALLY techinical, the proper Spanish would be "Los Sols'."

"But our jerseys don't say "The Suns" so why would it say 'Los'?"

"That's just the Spanish language, dude. Why do they put upside down exclamation points & question marks at the beginning of the sentence? Who knows?"

"Good point."

"I dunno though...I like where your head is at, but I think changing the team name might be a bit too much. Yeah, we may capture the Hispanic demographic, but what about all the non-Hispanic viewers? That's a bigger piece of the pie."

"True, true....maybe we combine it?"

"Like..."Los Suns."

"Yes! It's the best of the both worlds! It shows that we care about our Mexican vi-"

"Hispanic, dude. Calling them all Mexican just pisses them off even more. It's like calling all Americans "Yankees" or something. I don't get it either, but whatever."

"OK, hispanic. So the 'Los' part shows our Hispanic viewers "hey buddy, we respect you" but keeps our non-Hispanic viewers happy because they're still the 'Suns'."

"And you know what? We can still go retro too. We can change the font to be some crazy 70's disco-era font. Retro & multicultural!"

"Brilliant! These things will sell like hotcakes!"

"You mean calientecakes."

"Man, you are something else."

Worst fucking idea ever.