Nothing Special, Really

Monday, July 28, 2008

Weekend In Bend, Part 1

So I did come back. Although I really didn't want to.


I woke up on Friday at 8:30am, about a half-hour before we were supposed to leave. That may not seem very noteworthy until you consider that I probably didn't fall asleep until about 2 hours prior. I tried to force myself asleep around 1:30am, but considering I didn't wake up Thursday until 11:30am, combined with the excitement from thinking about the weekend ahead, it was a pointless cause.

The rest of our weekend roommates showed up within the next half-hour, and we finally hit the road around 9:30. I had spent parts of the past couple of days preparing a road trip playlist; 5.5 hours of music carefully selected to maximize the road trip experience. A delicate combination of obscure tracks and familiar sing-a-longs, placed in order to match the mood of the drive. So, how does one start this playlist?

Pink. "Get The Party Started."

Totally cliche, I know. In fact, it was purely a joke on my part, and within 10 seconds I skipped to the next track: "Plane Crash" by Toadies. No one else knew the song, but I couldn't think of a better opening track. It starts with a fast, punk-rock chord for about 5 second before the singer launches into a scream that sounds like an all-out roadhouse brawl. I let one out myself too, and with that, the weekend had begun.

I must commend myself on my playlist skills. Not everyone is able to take songs by the Gin Blossoms, Save Ferris, Portishead, The Dillinger Escape Plan, Rocket From The Crypt, and Europe and turn into a playlist that sounds cohesive, but also nearly time the playlist perfectly. Alas, the playlist ended with "Hysteria" by Muse about 10 miles before our actual destination. Personally, I blame it on getting tied up by idiots who either don't understand the concept of passing on the left or don't have the balls to do it.

We finally got to the house at McMenamins, and it was everything we could have hoped for. Two stories, five bedrooms, with a porch & and a bar not even 20 feet from our backdoor. The house was the biggest of the four that sat on the back end of the property with a community patio & and a whiskey-cigar bar right next door. Of course, this area was open to the public as well, so we had to share the area with many of Bend's fine residents, but only we had the ability to grab a pint and take it back to our house. We could drink on the porch, we could drink on the couch, we could drink in the shower, we could fall asleep on the beds drinking a pint if we wanted. Bend was our oyster, and we were about to start doing oyster shooters.

After kicking off the weekend with the requisite pints of Ruby and baskets of tator tots, we head into downtown Bend to find a place to eat. After consulting with some of the locals, we settled on an Italian place. Of course, we didn't take into consideration that most places probably weren't ready to handle a party of 8 on a Friday at a moment's notice, so we had to split into two tables. It ended up being a fairly good choice - not the best Italian I've ever had, but definitely good stuff.

We finally put an end to the carbohydrate binge and headed back to house. Others decided to indulge in the Turkish bath house on the premises, but the combo of beer, carbs, and two hours of sleep followed by a 8 hour road trip thoroughly kicked my ass, so at 7:45pm, I headed to the comfort of my bedroom.

Of course, that didn't last long. Sleep or no sleep, I wasn't about to let this weekend go to waste just because I was tired. I got in about a good hour of sleep before waking up around 9pm, and we all headed out to the patio again for some more pints. There was a 30 year high school reunion gathering at the bar as well, making for some good people watching. We spent time trying to identify who the school sluts were, and making fun of a man we named "Steve" for shattering his pint glass.

We headed back to the house afterwards for more drinking. Rather than spending $4 a pint, our friend Simon and I made a beer run earlier in the day to pick up some cheaper drinks. Simon, being a WSU Cougar, opted for the 30 pack of Keystone Light. I, being a man of more refined tastes, went with some Weinhard's Hefeweizen and an unfamiliar Oregon beer, MacTarnahan's Ale. After the obligatory chugging\shotguning of a can of Keystone, most of us gathered for some drunken games of Uno Attacks. Wac turned into bed early since she was staying dedicated to her marathon training & had planned a 10 mile run the next morning. Our other two guests, Clay & Brooke, finally arrived and headed out to drink with their friends Matt & Kelli. The rest of us stayed home for a rousing round of Apples To Apples. The game started off slow, with most of us making very well thought out choices, but as the beer kept flowing, the arguments got louder and more boisterous. By the time the night started coming to a close, we were shouting out statements like "What the fuck is wrong with you, how is Eleanor Roosevelt not sexier than a cactus?"

We finally put the game to an end around 1:30am, and we called it a night shortly thereafter. The house was cluttered with smashed Keystone Light cans, half-empty bottles of Hefe, and discarded leftover containers from the Italian restaurant. It was a disaster. But compared to how we would leave the house the following night, the place was as pristine as an operation room.

Coming tomorrow: a bicycle built for four, quite possibly the best beer ever, and drunken bodysliding.


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